Episode#12-Internet Dating...IS A LIE

*Peeta has convinced both Effie and Haymitch to join a dating sight. Of course, this can only end badly*

SexyBitchET-Hey, Sexy

SensitiveGuyQQ50-Hey sweetie pie, I've missed you.

SexyBitchET-...Hey, Babe, I've been thinking about this for a long time-us-and I think we should meet up. Face to Face. And we could...and...

SensitiveGuyQQ50-And what my snuggly bear?

SexyBitchET-...I want to do you. I want to try the jiggly.

SensitiveGuyQQ50-Whoa! I think that we need to wait, snuggly bear. We need to meet first. Don't rush this.

SexyBitchET-Why not? Are you scared? I'm ready, but if you're too scared...if you don't want me enough... there are...other men...

SensitiveGuyQQ50-NO! I love you very much, it's just I want to get to know you first.

SexyBitchET-...Dinner first. Then to a hotle. Okay? No short cuts. No way out.

SensitiveGuyQQ50-All right, see you then Mon Cheri.

SexyBitchET-Bring a rope.

*Haymitch and Effie arrive. Effie is dressed in a leather jumpsuit, chains around her waist, and dark eyeliner. Haymitch wears a tux, a top hat with his hair slicked back. He holds about 50 something roses*

Effie-...This just got really awkword...

Haymitch-...Still wanna do it?

Effie-No!!